In Their Eyes

I wonder what I would see if I got a view from their eyes

After all the world is not all sunshine and roses

It’s tough

So tough that many days I find myself questioning am I good enough

A good enough mother, a good enough wife, and most of all a good enough human being

Am I making the right decision to be deemed worthy

Have I earned enough tickets to heaven or would my actions be seen as deeds merely for self gain

The thought alone makes me fall to my knees

Begging the most high to hear my heart

My intentions are pure although they may not appear that way

May I be lighter than the feather on judgement day

But hear in the physical, please find me worthy

Worthy of the love from my creations

My creations that look at me through the eyes of such innocence

Eyes that look past my faults and embrace all there is of me

Because no matter what

I am mom in their eyes

My Song For You

Artist Unknown

As the sorrow filled voice of Donny Hathaway

Settles in our ears I take in this moment

The lyrics a reflection of our feelings for one another

Loving in a place where there’s no space or time

One could only dream of a love like that, but in you I have found it

With you I have embraced it

Together we have mastered it

So much so that to be without one another would be the equivalent of suffering a slow heartbreaking death

A death that would surely be welcomed if that would lead me to you again

Back to this moment

This moment of love void of space or time

Serenaded by the sorrow filled voice of Donny Hathaway

Singing the lyrics to a song that I have now claimed as

My song for you

The One

Artist Unknown

The other day someone asked me how I knew you were the one

The question instantly stomped me

And I become flooded with memories of when we first begun

The moment I looked in those deep brown eyes and told you my name

The second I laughed when you told me I was your wife

All the fights and arguments between us as our younger selves met our older selves

Every birth of our children that caused me to fall in love all over again

And now I have my answer

I didn’t know you were the one when I first met you

There was no fairytale love at first sight

My heart didn’t skip a beat the moment I met you,

But when you held my hand and walked through this thing called life destined to become man and wife

Continuing to fall in love with one another’s higher self

No longer able to see life with anyone else

I knew then you were the one

Stained Tears

Artist Unknown

Tears cascaded down my face

As I found myself further in this sunken place

Lost in the thoughts

Of a love long left behind

I hear your voice riddled with sadness

But still I could no longer stay in this madness

The heart wants what the heart wants

Unfortunately what my heart wants is not what my soul needs

Healing

Healing from the toxicity of the burning flame

inside the both of us

The flame that made the pain we created easily soothed from the passion that followed

The passion that slowly faded with the rising of the morning sun and we’ve left to ask each other

What have we become?

When did we become this couple that no longer basks in the love but look forward to the making up to numb the pain from the endless injection of love and hate?

Where do we go from here?

You afraid to answer the questions which leaves me forced to make the decision for both of us.

Silently packing my bags and creeping off into the darkness at the midnight hour.

Hoping one day you’ll forgive my cowardly exit, but thank me for release both of us from the torturous merry go round.

The merry go round that replays visions in my head of what could have been if only I had stayed,

But instead I have only wishful thinking and stained tears.

What are you thankful for?

Today I take the time to reflect and give thanks. In a world constantly focused on Covid and politics, it’s easy to not pay attention to the blessings that we have had or currently receiving. So I take the day to slow down and focus on all the good in my life. I’m surrounded by family and friends that love me for me, those same family and friends are healthy, plans to move forward with my writing and business are coming along nicely, and most importantly I’ve been blessed to see another day that could’ve easily been taken from me. So for all that I am grateful. I encourage everyone to take a moment out of the day and soak in the moment, reflect, and give thanks for your blessings.

One Last Time

Artist Unknown

As you place your lips on mine

Broken promises whisper in my head

Reciting the words I long to speak out loud

One last time

Those three words will shift the dynamic of our endless love affair

Those three words rejuvenate the strength that was depleted so long ago

Given freely to you during a time when I felt you were mine

A mistake on my part

For sharing a love that was simply ours on borrowed time

Time that ran out long ago when I went from number one to the other woman

A position I didn’t know existed until she made herself known

Revealing your true colors you tried desperately to camouflage with sweet nothings gently gracing my ears under the cover of late night meetings

Meetings that have now long ended but yet I’m still in attendance

Waiting on you to walk through the door with more of the love I desperately crave and despise at the same time

So much so that as you come in seeking the shelter from a stressful day with her

And you place your lips on mine

I find the voice I lost long ago and whisper

One last time

In Front Of The Fireplace

At the start of the hour

We find ourselves in my favorite spot

In front of the fireplace

With the glow highlighting your face

My third eye opens for you

Watching you with renewed interest

Longing for a sign that we are on the same page

Begging for your touch until finally you put me out of my misery

With the sweetest forehead kiss creating a trail down to my lips

Before becoming frozen in this moment of no turning back

Creating a mental note of the day that our lives changed

In front of the fireplace

Family

In my darkest times

I called out to you

Desperate for love and understanding

Seeking relief from this sinkhole

I just couldn’t climb out of

Begging to be set free from the Bermuda Triangle I found myself imprisoned in

And as the light faded

Encasing me in pure darkness

You answered, each and every one of you

Let your torches shine bright

Guiding me back to the path I strayed so far from

Filling me with the love I needed when I felt I had none

And giving me the strength to carry on

Though bonded by blood and life long commitments, your actions are what truly make us family.

Rebirth Of A Phoenix

As the weight of the world consumes me

And I lay quietly sinking into oblivion

A faint voice whispers in my ear,

“Who are you?

I have never met you before.

I’m sure I would remember you.

A child so lost and broken.

Where did you come from ?”

The voice continues as I sink deeper and deeper

Feeling my body consumed with fire and finally

Overtaken as my eyes close

Only to awaken anew

And to the voice I answer,

“I am a descendant of you.

No longer lost and broken.

I have risen from the ashes of the Phoenix.

Rejuvenated and Reborn.

Through The Valley Of Death

Through the valley of death

I have walked with many

But feared none

Filled with the purest light

My journey has just begun

A battle of wills that would make most fall

Falls victim to my resilience

I am the steel that sharpens the lions claws

Ready to defeat my enemies in a simple swipe

No matter the day

No matter the hour

As I walk through the valley of death

Where isfet roams and darkness devours

I walk with many

But fear none